A Nurse of 38 Years Reveals Why Women Over 70 Quietly Stop Wearing Bras
For most of the women she cared for, it came down to pressure. Brenda Hollis, RN, is 64 and heading there herself.
I spent most of my 38 years as a nurse on one long hall in a nursing home. I helped more women get dressed than I can count. So I’ll tell you what I saw, right at the top.
A lot of women over 70 stop wearing a bra, and they don’t tell anyone. When I asked them why, the answer I heard most was simple. It hurts.
The straps press into the tops of the shoulders. The band digs into the ribs all day. By afternoon it’s sore, and at night there’s a red line where the band sat. The band also pushes soft skin up into a roll across the back, and most women think that roll is weight.
The second reason came up less often, but it cut deeper. A stiff shoulder can’t reach behind to do the hooks, and asking someone to do them feels awful.
I’m 64, and my own shoulder is stiff now. I know that bra pain from the inside. Last spring I found something I wear in place of a bra. It pulls on over your head. It has no band around the ribs and no hooks. I’ll show you what it is and how I tested it.
What I saw on my hall
I’ve changed names and room numbers here.
Ruth was 77 and wore a 38DD. On bath days I saw her shoulders. The straps had pressed deep grooves into them, and she folded washcloths under the straps to pad them. Around three most afternoons she asked to go back to her room. I thought she was tired. She was going to take her bra off.
Dorothy was 81. She kept her bras folded in her top drawer and didn’t wear any of them. She wore a cardigan buttoned up to her chin, even on hot days. Once I offered to hook her bra for her. She said no, and neither of us brought it up again.
On my weekend home visits, Marjorie, 69, hated photos of her back because of “the roll.” On bath day I took her bra off, and the ridge where the band sat was deep. Twenty minutes later it had mostly smoothed out. Weight doesn’t leave in twenty minutes. A lot of that roll is soft skin that the band pushes up over itself.
Then it was my turn
Nurses lift and turn people all day. By 63 my left shoulder was stiff most mornings, and my bra was making twelve hour shifts longer.
I have a heavy chest too. By noon the band dug in, and by afternoon my shoulders ached. In summer the band was wet by lunch, and in the car after work I’d reach up under my top to unhook it before I even started the engine.
What I tried first
I’m a nurse, so I tested things on myself.
I got measured at a department store and bought the “right” size. I tried wireless bras, a sports bra, front hook bras, a bra extender and a tank with a shelf bra. The wireless ones still had the band. The sports bra squeezed harder. The front hooks were tiny, and the extender let the whole bra ride up my back. The shelf bra was a thin strip of elastic, which is a band with a new name.
Going without didn’t hurt, but I felt undressed, and with nothing holding me up my neck and shoulders were sore by supper.
The pressure rule
Nurses learn early that if a patient lies on one spot too long, that spot gets sore. So we turn patients every two hours and spread the weight out.
A bra puts the weight of your chest on three narrow spots, the two straps and the band, from morning to night. The heavier your chest, the harder those spots press. That’s where Ruth’s grooves came from, and the soreness most of us feel by afternoon.
So I went looking for something with no band that shared the weight over more of my body, and it had to go on over my head.
The tank I found
Joyce, 72, one of our residents, had arthritis in both hands and still came to breakfast dressed and neat every day. When I asked how, she showed me what she had on under her blouse. Her daughter had found it for her.
It’s called Susie’s Built-in Bra Comfort Tank. I ordered one that night. I didn’t expect much.
Here is how it holds you without a band.
The molded cups are sewn in, so they sit in one place inside the tank. The body is snug, 80% nylon and 20% spandex, and it fits close from your chest down past your waist. In a bra, the band is what anchors the cups to you. In this tank, the whole snug body does that job, so the cups stay where they are without one tight strip around your ribs.
The straps are wide, so they lie flat on the shoulders. The hem is extra long, and you can tuck it in so it doesn’t ride up. There are no hooks and no wire. You pull it on over your head.
That was the part I checked hardest, because the shelf tank I tried before had fooled me. Its “bra” was one thin strip of elastic under the chest. This one has real molded cups sewn into it, and the hold comes from the snug body around them. That’s a different build, and it’s why I gave it a try.
The neckline is square and sits neat under a blouse or a sweater. On hot days at home I wear it on its own. I have the nude for under my scrubs and a black one for under sweaters.
How I tested it
The first morning, I put my stiff arm in first, then pulled it over my head, then the other arm. It took about as long as putting on a T-shirt.
Then I wore it for a twelve hour shift. I bent over beds, helped people sit up and reached for the top shelf in the supply room. The hem stayed tucked and the straps didn’t slide. On the drive home my shoulders weren’t sore, and I didn’t reach under my top in the car. When I took it off that night, there was no red line around my ribs.
I washed it and wore it again, several times over a few weeks. The cups stayed put and kept their shape.
Before bed I stood sideways at the mirror in a knit top, the kind that shows everything on your back. It lay smooth from my shoulders down. It took me a day or two to stop reaching for a band that wasn’t there. After that, three o’clock came and went on my shifts, and I didn’t notice.
Dorothy
After a month, I called Dorothy’s daughter and asked if I could bring her one. Her daughter said her mother hadn’t worn a bra in two years and to try anything. Dorothy looked at the tank for a long time. I told her there was nothing to hook and nobody would need to help her. She took it into her bathroom and closed the door. She was in there a while.
When she came out, the cardigan was open. She had put it on by herself. She walked down to breakfast like that, and I went into the med room for a few minutes before I went back to work. The next week her daughter ordered two more, one in black and one in burgundy, so she’d always have a clean one in the drawer.
For Dorothy it was the hooks. Ruth’s trouble was her shoulders, and she has two tanks now. She says the grooves have faded.
What other women say
The company says over 10,000 women have ordered these tanks. I read a lot of the reviews before I bought one for Dorothy. These are a few that matched what I saw. I picked some that weren’t all praise, because nothing fits every woman the same way.
Gloria, 68, size 3XL (40DD):
“I figured nothing without an underwire could hold me. It holds me fine for a normal day. It doesn’t push me up like my old bra did. What it doesn’t do is dig into my shoulders.”
Janet, 71, size L:
“Washed mine maybe twenty times now. Cups are still in the same place and still the same shape. I do lay it flat to dry.”
Barbara, 74, size XL:
“My right shoulder is bad. Bad arm first like the nurse says. First time I did it I had to sit on the bed. Now I just do it standing.”
Sue, 66, size M:
“Wore my gray knit sweater to church and looked at my back in the car window after. It was smooth. I didn’t know that sweater could look like that.”
Helen, 70, size 2XL:
“I sized up because I was between sizes and I’m glad I did. It felt odd the first day without a band, kept thinking something was missing. By day three I stopped thinking about it.”
From the comments
Bev, 72: we used to find bras shoved behind the nightstand at my moms place. nobody ever asked why
Carol, 67: Mine came in the burgundy. Wasnt sure about the color but I like it
Lois, 75: 11 bras in my drawer and I wear 2. Ordering one to try
If you want to try it
Susie’s Built-in Bra Comfort Tank. Sewn-in molded cups, wide straps, a snug nylon and spandex body, and a long hem that tucks in. No band, no hooks, no wire. Sizes S to 6XL. Nude, black, coffee, olive green and burgundy.
The 90-Day Perfect Fit Guarantee. If your tank doesn’t fit the way you hoped, let them know within 90 days, and they’ll send you a new size for free. It covers size and fit, and you keep the first one.
One tank is $34.95, down from $69.95. If you want to feel it first, start with one. That’s what I did.
Buy 2, Get 1 Free: three tanks for $69.90. That’s about what one tank cost before the price came down. Three means one to wear, one in the wash and one spare. Once I knew mine fit, three is what I wished I had bought.
Shipping is free in the US.
Picking your size: go by your shirt size. You don’t need a band number or a cup letter. If you’re between sizes, go up one. The size chart on the site shows which bra sizes each tank size covers, if you’d like to check.
Susie’s Built-in Bra Comfort Tank
Buy 2, Get 1 Free · 3 tanks for $69.90 · Free US shipping
- Sewn-in molded cups held in place by a snug body
- Wide, flat straps that lie smooth on your shoulders
- No band, no hooks, no wire
- Pulls on over your head
- Long hem that tucks in so it stays down
- Go by your shirt size, S to 6XL
90-Day Perfect Fit Guarantee: if it doesn’t fit the way you hoped, you get a new size free, and you keep the first one.
Get My Tanks: Buy 2, Get 1 Free →One to wear, one in the wash and one spare.
Questions women ask me
“I’m a 40DD or bigger. Will it really hold me?”
For an everyday hold, a lot of bigger women say yes, like Gloria above. The molded cups are sewn in, the straps are wide, and the snug body keeps the cups in place. It won’t lift you the way an underwire push-up does. If you’re between sizes, go up one. If the fit still isn’t right, the guarantee sends you a new size.
“Do the cups shift around or go flat?”
They’re sewn in, so they don’t float loose inside the tank. The company says they stay put through the wash, and mine have kept their shape so far.
“Will it ride up when I sit or bend?”
The hem is extra long so you can tuck it in. Mine stays down through a shift of bending over beds and a long drive home in the car. If you wear it untucked, it can move a little more.
“Will it look like I have no bra on?”
No. The molded cups give you shape and cover, and the smooth body lies flat under a blouse. With no band or hooks, there’s nothing to show through across your back.
“Can I wear it by itself?”
Yes. The square neckline and wide straps look like a regular tank top. I wear mine alone around the house and in the yard, and under a sweater when I go out.
“How do I wash it?”
I wash mine and lay it flat to dry. The cups are sewn in, so there’s nothing to take out first. Check the care label on your tank.
“Is it hot?”
It’s nylon and spandex, so it isn’t as cool as cotton. For me, the worst of the heat was always the wet band around my ribs, and this has no band.
“My shoulder is stiff. Can I get it over my head?”
Sit down if you need to. Put the stiff arm through its strap first and pull it up to your shoulder. Then bring the neck over your head with your good arm, and slide that arm in. It’s how nurses help people dress.
“What does the guarantee cover?”
Size and fit. If it doesn’t fit the way you hoped, tell them within 90 days and they’ll send you a new size free. You keep the first one. It doesn’t cover refunds.
Ready when you are
If your bra has you counting down to three o’clock, you don’t have to keep doing that. Pull it on in the morning, get dressed and go on with your day.
Buy 2, Get 1 Free. Free US shipping. 90-Day Perfect Fit Guarantee: if the size isn’t right, you get a new size free.
